How To Be Sensual On Dates: #1 Thing Men Ask Matchmakers For In A Woman Is Femininity

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Feminine energy is all about “just being” and staying in the present moment.  When you are fully in the “now”, you are fully in your senses.  You are sensual.


Men love women who can stay in the moment with them and can help them get out of their heads (where they are swimming in thoughts of work pressures and other life responsibilities) and live in their own aliveness.  A woman who can help guide a man to his own senses and feelings is the kind of goddess that men search their lives to find. How To Be More Intimate & Enchant Men Effortlessly


Here are 3 ways to be sensual and live more fully in the moment when on a first date with a man:


Be Sensual:  Stay With Your Feelings & Voice Them


A sensual woman is fully in her body and listens to her heart.  She is sensitive to how her environment affects her senses and knows when she’s blissful in a moment and when she’s irritated.  Too many people ignore their feelings and disconnect from them in order not to appear difficult to others.  This puts you in your head and takes you out of the moment.  Resentments build and you lose your sense of playful enjoyment with the company you keep.


When on a first date, instead of stifling your negative feelings about something a date says that irks you or the unpleasant temperature in a restaurant or movie theater, speak up.  Don’t get dramatic about it, just say, with confidence, that you are uncomfortable:


“I feel a little perturbed with what you just said.  Could you help me understand what you meant.”
“This theater is really cold.  I think I’ll go ask to turn down the air.”


The key is to listen to your feelings, give them a voice and move on.  Try to get back to a positive connection.  That should be your aim—to be constantly doing what you can to stay happy in your heart.  This means not ignoring negative sensory input but dealing with it fast and effectively.  This allows you and him a more positive space to get connected.


Use Words Effectively To Create “Sensory Bonding”


Every moment experienced with a man is a chance to let him inside your world and intoxicate him with your unique essence.  Nothing does that more effectively than words. Your words are windows into your soul, so choose wisely.


be sensual, femininity, connect with his heart, dating tips, sensual with menA man doesn’t fall in love with a woman because she shares the same ideas and morals as him. A man may respect and care about a woman for these reasons, but he falls in love with the vulnerability in a woman.   A woman’s exposed vulnerability makes a man want to protect and care for her.


Don’t only throw around ideas when on a date, but instead, speak about your feelings and provoked physical sensations to create an intimate connection. Refrain from trying to impress him with cerebral conversation or too much humor.  These are both defense mechanisms and walls to intimacy.  Instead use words to express and expose how life has directly affected your underbelly.


When telling a man a story (or conversing about a subject), talk about how an event (or an issue) touched you.  So, for example, instead of intellectually dissecting the structure of a film you just saw together, talk about how it made you feel and what senses it stimulated; “That moment when the mother kissed her son—I felt like a child again, so soothed inside.  I could smell the warm bread she was baking in that kitchen.”


Share your feelings openly with him and give him a sense of the poetic side of you. This allows for connection through what I call “sensory bonding.” Sensory bonding is when someone bonds with another over a shared sensory experience.  Sensory bonding on a first date makes a man think, “There’s something about her that I connect with on this unspoken level.  I feel like there’s a commonality of life.  The way she expresses herself, it makes me feel myself and I can see that we understand each other on a deep level.”  It makes him feel connected to your soul and to his own life force.  He feels truly alive inside, just like what poetry does to a person.


Soothe & Comfort Him As You Listen


Some people would argue that a sensual woman sacrifices her sensitivity to indulge herself in the pleasure of the now.  But I argue that a sensual woman is sensual in more than just the 5 physical senses of sight, touch, sound, taste and smell.  She is also extremely sensitive and empathic to the emotional needs of those around her, making sensitivity her 6th sense.  She knows how to feel out the silent spaces hinged between the words of another person.


When on a first date, chances are you aren’t going to have to comfort and soothe a man’s extreme feelings of despair or anguish like you would if he were a friend in crisis.  But you can still take opportunities to make him feel like you are a blanket around his emotions, calming and caressing them quiet and calm.


Know those li’l jackets they sell for doggies that hold them tight during a thunderstorm?  The pressure around the dogs’ midsections makes them feel soothed.  Well, I want you to be like one of these li’l jackets because that’s where true intimacy breeds.


When your date starts opening up, take the opportunity to not just listen, but to hear his feelings.  If he talks about his stressful job and all his responsibilities there, tell him what you see as he speaks; “Wow.  That sounds stressful.”


Then follow it up with a validating comment that makes him feel supported; “It’s commendable that you can wake up every morning and face those kinds of challenges head-on.”


You could also give him the gift of empathy by extending him permission to not have to feel that way, “You seem like a hardworking guy, you should give yourself a break now and then and just find small ways to be calm and loving to yourself.  You deserve it!”


When you can see another person’s emotional experience and soothe and validate those feelings for him (being his li’l jacket), he will feel like he needs you in his life.  The first date could end with him rushing to call a friend to say one of those cheesy movie lines; “I don’t know how I ever got along without this woman!”


Being a sensual woman who is brave enough to speak up, confident enough to expose her vulnerability and wise enough to hear a man’s unspoken emotion is so easy.  It just feels, at first, uncomfortable and unfamiliar.  However, the more you practice, the more automatic it becomes, and you soon realize that you’ve been blocking yourself from intimacy and connection for too long.


My eBook, Red Rose Woman:  The Enchantress Inside You offers more tips on how to be sensual and live in your feminine energy so that the real you, the goddess inside, can finally break surface and touch the hearts of men everywhere.

The Key To His Heart: Be A Sensitive & Sensual Woman

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To be a sensitive and sensual woman you have to be interested in him, not strive to be interesting.


Stop trying to impress men (or that special man) with how smart, funny, fun, sexy and sexual you can be, and start being interested in knowing him on a deeper level.  The way to make him fall in love with you resides in how well you can build an emotional connection with him.


Building an emotional connection with a man is not the same thing as building a friendship with him.  Yes, friendships are strong when an emotional connection exists, but the difference is that the emotional connection I’m talking about makes him attracted to you.


Create An Emotional Connection That Includes Deep Sensuality


Next time you are with a man let him into your goddess world by indulging your senses while with him.  Live fully in the moment and enjoy the sounds, tastes, smells, sights and textures of objects all around you.  Comment on how “Mmm” the dessert mousse tastes or how “Ooh” the red wine smells.  Touch things– your hair, the tabletop, his crisp cotton shirt, etc.– and register the temperatures and textures.


This may sound strange but it will help you get into your body and stay present in your thoughts.  It will also help you stay and feel grounded in your feelings and will help him feel grounded in his own.


Men are pressured by society in their jobs and with being providers of all kinds in their communities.  The key to attracting him is finding a way to get him feeling connected to his feelings.  He wants to feel alive inside and enjoy life.  He just gets stuck in his thoughts and responsibilities that weigh on him.


A sensual woman who can eat a chocolate mousse and make it an almost sexual experience is going to allow a man to forget about his life stressors and live in the gloriousness of mousse.  How fabulous is that– that a dessert can be used as a tool to make a man smitten with you?


Or if there’s music playing, dance a little in your seat if you feel so compelled.


Or if there’s a beautiful painting on the wall talk about how it makes you feel inside.


He will feel his inner poetry when you show him yours and this will change his life and make him feel reliant on you to soften his edges.  See, female pals are fun to hang out with and talk about sports and gossip.  A real enchantress uses her sensuality to make a moment more than fun, relaxing and “chill”; she makes a moment sexy.  Sensuality = sexy!


Create An Emotional Connection By Being A Sensitive Woman


Men are sensitive, too.  My goodness, we all know about the fragility of the male ego (Can someone say eggshell?)  The best way to capture a man’s heart and make him fall in love is to find a way to express deep empathy and make him feel understood and cared for.


Now, you can’t coddle him or baby him, but you should find a way to make him feel like being with you is like being held in the arms of a nurturing goddess.


Take the time to:

Appreciate him (“Thank you so much for that compliment.”)

Motivate him (“I think you are a brilliant man and can do anything you want.”)

Validate his feelings (“It sounds like you had an awful day at work.  I’m so sorry you had to experience all that.”)

Empathize with him (“I understand how stressful work can be.  I think you should give yourself a chance to relax sometimes.  You deserve it.”)


All this may sound pretty obvious, but so often we forget to actually say these kinds of empowering and nurturing statements.  We assume that he knows we care and we even think we said them when we didn’t.  A lot of men are sensitive to words– that’s why they use less of them in relationships.  When you can touch his heart with loving, supportive words, you can connect immediately with his heart.


To be a sensual woman who has a sensitive heart you have to wash away your self-conscious thoughts and live in the moment.  You have to give fully of yourself and be fully receptive of the sensory input he offers.  If he touches you, let yourself melt into his touch and tell him how good it feels.  If he gives you words of affirmation, let him know that you hear him and appreciate him for his gifts of love.


Related Links

Enchantress Secrets

Mesmerize Him

Red Rose Woman

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red rose woman, what do men look for in a wife, man magnet, dating help, dating tricksRed Rose Woman:  The Enchantress Inside You

What is that thing that certain women possess that make them enchantresses?


A modern enchantress is 100% feminine (sensual, soft, emotional and tender) and at the same time she is independent and confident.  She has Female Fire.


She innately gets that her job in a relationship is to make her man feel like the best man that he can be.  She knows that her love is like water and his pride like a cork, rising higher and higher with her adoration and support.


The original enchantresses of the Round Table knew how to make alpha males into chivalrous, gallant knights.  They knew how to use their Female Fire to make them better warriors and better humans, at the same time.


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This woman is inside you and she is waiting for you to unleash her into the world of eager men– men who restlessly long for your love spell!


Red Rose Woman:  The Enchantress Inside You will show you how to offer him the kind of love that will never bore him, the kind of love that will make him grow up, face his responsibilities and love you the way you deserve.


Ready to make that special man into your brilliant knight?
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What Attracts A Man To A Woman? Goddess Energy!

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Wondering what attracts a man to a woman?  Men are vastly different as individuals but are very easy to understand as a collective whole.


Most straight men want to find that special woman who makes them feel like they can go out into the world and accomplish anything.  The average good guy wants a woman he can proudly stand beside at a public function, a woman who understands and fulfills his sexual needs, a woman who trusts in herself and stands up for herself when necessary, and most importantly a woman who ‘gets’ him on a deep emotional level.  This type of woman has goddess energy!


So how to you harness your female power to emit goddess energy and quickly and easily become the best version of yourself for your relationship?  Well, first, you have to stop doing things for the relationship and for him and you have to start doing things for yourself.  I don’t mean that you become a demanding diva with your nose in the air and your finger pointing constantly at the things you want your man to do for you.  I do, however, want you to relish in selfishness.


Selfishness is first part of a spiritual journey and the first step toward having the kind of goddess energy your man adores.


Read More From Connect With His Heart:  Harness Your Feminine Allure & Captivate Men (Part 1)


Many spirituality teachers discuss the importance of being selfish.  You must have self-love if you are to love anyone.  If you don’t take the time to know yourself and accept yourself on a deep level (this requires you to be self-centered), you will always put your anxiety and negative self-reflection out into the world.   You will try to control and manage others instead of act truly giving and loving free of charge.  You will pull the kinds of reactions you want from people instead of allow them to feel fully accepted in your presence.  Why?  Because without self-love and self-acceptance you’re too reliant on others to feed you love. Your lack of self-love will make you desperate to fill the seeping bottomless pit of lovelessness in your heart with other people’s loving words and actions.


When you are truly selfish, YOU provide for yourself and you get to know your body and mind to the point of being able to know when you need to pamper yourself and when you feel ‘charged’ enough with positive loving energies to go out into the world and truly do for others.  Having goddess energy is knowing when to look out for yourself and when to do what you can for your man.


When you don’t put yourself first, you rely too heavily on your man to make you happy.  You get hypersensitive to everything he says and does and you become paranoid.  This happens because you give him too much power.  You need too much from him, and when the cards are all in his hand, you feel out-of-control.  You try to regain control by controlling him-– what he says, where he goes, how he shows you affection, etc.



Goddesses aren’t codependent; codependent women are so entangled in a man, they don’t know where he ends and they begin.


Codependent women try to soothe, nurture and love a man for all the wrong reasons– they do these things to soothe, nurture and love themselves.  This kind of transference feels really smothering and weird to a man.  It can fill him with anxiety:  Constant soothing makes the receiver feel like he is being soothed because something is wrong, and this will make him anxious.  Lots of parents do this– they constantly soothe a child to feel calm and the child grows up anxious and feeling all the time like some impending doom is upon them.  Don’t do this to your man.  It will push him away.


Read More From Connect With His Heart:  How To Express Love To A Man


goddess energy, being selfish isn't badGoddesses avoid codependence and transference by being very mindful of their behavior in a relationship.  A goddess is so in touch with herself, she knows when she feels ‘off’ inside.  She also knows when she’s focusing too heavily on her relationship and doing it a disservice.  She knows the difference between having healthy and reasonable emotional, spiritual and sexual needs in a relationship and putting too much pressure on the man to be her everything.


Goddess energy makes you calm, patient, observant and detached.  What do I mean by detached?


A goddess can disengage from negative energy quickly.  She knows when to leave an argument (or how to avoid one from starting) before it becomes drama.  Goddess energy is about stopping an obsessive mind from getting hooked on a chemical response.  Goddesses can tell immediately when they are losing power to a man or a circumstance.  They know how to detach from the fears and insecurities that can dictate poor choices.  They know when and how to re-engage in fun and self-loving activities to take care of themselves when things are bad in a relationship.


Goddess energy empowers a woman to know when to walk away from a relationship and a man.


Goddesses know when there is more heartache than happiness in a relationship.  They also know that happiness in a relationship is not about chemistry and feeling a ‘high’ when things are good in the relationship.  Happiness in a relationship involves no chemical highs and instead is more of a soft, safe, peaceful and tender feeling.  Goddesses know that the most important part of a relationship is emotional security and feeling safe (not to be abandoned, controlled, played with, objectified, etc.)


Read More From Connect With His Heart:  Dating?  How To Invite Love Into Your Life


What attracts a man to a woman is a goddess vibe that sends a man a clear message:  ”I am a loving, trusting and calm woman and I expect respect, fidelity and love from you in return.”  This kind of energy keeps a man from feeling smothered and walking on eggshells, while also keeping him ‘in check’.  He feels equally that she is easy-going in the relationship and also high-maintenance (in the sense that he knows she will not tolerate real crap from him).


Finally, goddess energy is sensual, soft and sweet.


Goddesses know how to ‘tenderize’ a man’s soul and win a man’s heart with her soft curves, sultry voice and loving caresses.  The key to being a sensual goddess is to know your boundaries.  When you know for a fact what you will and won’t tolerate, your body can loosen up and your mind stays present with a man (enjoying his company).  It’s when you don’t trust yourself with a man that you get brittle and step into your defensive masculine energy.  Your masculine energy protects you and allows your subconscious to scream in a man’s ear; “You better back the f**k up and not hurt me!”.  Men can not get intimate with that kind of energy.  It makes them challenge you, play power games with you or just run away from you.  Female energy whispers in a man’s ear; “Come hither.  I trust myself enough to not let you too close unless you behave.  So be a good boy, and let’s enjoy each other.”


Sign up for my Love Advice Newsletter.  In it, I dissect your fears and insecurities and shine a light on all the ways in which your subconscious sabotages your changes at bliss.  I’ll show you how to instantly have a better connection to yourself and your inner child.  Your inner child, free of distrust, neurosis and self-loathing is what attracts a man to a woman!


Related Links:

Red Rose Woman:  The Enchantress Inside You

Mesmerize Him Into Your Arms

Kristina Marchant’s Prism Effect

The Worst LIE You’ve Been Told About How To Get A Man To Love You… Learn THE TRUTH About What Men Really Need To Fall Madly, Deeply In Love


My New eBook!

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The Prism Effect:  How To Get A Man To Love You

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From the Desk of:  Dating and Relationship Coach Kristina Marchant


Hi there.  I’m Kristina and I’ve dedicated the last several years of my life to helping women save and heal their love lives.


You’ve landed on my site, searching for answers.  I admire your efforts and I respect your desire to fix the problems in your life.  A woman who actively looks for help and doesn’t just sit around feeling sorry for herself is the kind of woman who deserves a good man.


But you wouldn’t be reading this if your man was actually treating you the way you deserve to be treated.


“You Aren’t Getting Love & Attention Worthy Of A Goddess!”


Let me guess…


He’s treating you like a second-class citizen! Where he was once attentive and sweet, now he seems distracted and is short-tempered.

when he pulls back, relationship problems

Does it feel like something is different between him and you? Like he’s uninspired to go the extra mile with you? Does it feel like he’s just ‘mailing in’ his part in the relationship?


Was he once calling you The One and now he’s barely calling you at all? Did he do nice, thoughtful things for you and now you’re the one working your butt off to keep him around?


Maybe he’s even downright mean to you now! Acting like you’re a needy pest who is interfering in his busy life!


If all this sounds exactly like your relationship, I know how you feel. I’ve been where you are right now.


“I Turned My Love Life Around & Now It’s Your Turn”


Because I know how frustrated and heartbroken you are, I’m really excited to help you today. I’m eager to share some POWERFUL tools on how to get a man to love you.  I can bet all the “secrets” you’ve heard on how to get a man’s love were idiotic junk.


I’m pretty sure MY advice is some you’ve NEVER heard before.   See, that’s the most EYE-OPENING part of what I teach:


The REAL answer to saving your relationship completely contradicts everything you’ve been told about men.I’m about to ask you to go against all the things you’ve been trained to do in relationships. And you probably have been doing these incorrect things since you were a little girl trying to get daddy’s attention.


But don’t worry, it’s all okay! Once you learn my love lessons, you’ll see how getting a man to love you is so much easier, faster and more fun than you ever thought it would be.


Oh yes! It’s possible to turn around even the worst relationship at the drop of a hat.  There could still be hope, even if he’s acting like a difficult, moody man who does ZERO for the relationship.


“Don’t Make The Mistake Most Women Make When A Man Takes Space”


Before I offer you my advice and reveal some of my amazing Goddess Guidance on how to get a man to love you, let’s first addressthe BIGGEST LIE you’ve been told about romance and men…


THE LIE: It’s You’re Job As A Woman To Work Hard On The Relationship!


If you’re like I was, you think that you’re supposed to work hard to hook a man, strategize to keep him interested and break your back carrying the relationship.


get him to fall for youIf you grew up like I did, you watched as your mom and other women burned energy on stuffing down their hurt and anger, their personal dreams and their real relationship desires to keep a men happy.


Society taught you that if you were the good girl– the sweet, sexy, innocent, compliant, quiet and accommodating lady– you’d nail a husband who’d respect you and maybe even worship you.


And you wonder why you get angry, fed up and disheartened by your love life? This advice is so frustrating and disempowering to women! We’re rendered voiceless just by being women in today’s male-dominated world—Do we really have to be more so to get man?


And the worst part about this degrading advice—it doesn’t work! It’s a LIE!


You’ve tried so hard to act like some 1950’s male ideal of the perfect woman, and, then, even after forcing yourself to hide who you really are and what you really feel to get a man to love you, you STILL DON’T have a solid relationship!


Listen up…




“Acting Like The Woman You Think He Wants Will Squash Any Feelings He Has Left For You!”


You know who gets a good man: A GODDESS! And a goddess isn’t a girl at all.  She’s a woman!


A goddess is hardly accommodating, quiet and compliant. She never compromises who she is; she embraces and shares all her feelings, needs and desire with men, all the time. And they LOVE her for it!


relationship issues, bring men backYou can unleash YOUR inner goddess.You just have to be willing to shift the way you see your relationship and change some of the things you’ve been doing to get a man to love you.


Even if you feel worn-down, angry, unhappy, defeated, insecure and even unsexy at this point in your love life…


You can completely transform yourself into the goddess of his dreams over night. He’ll sit up at look at you as if your price-tag increased exponentially in a matter of minutes!


And it all starts with the TRUTH of how to get a man to love you:


The TRUTH: It’s The Man’s Job To Work Hard To Keep The Relationship Going! (It’s Not Even A Fifty-Fifty Effort)


I bet just hearing that feels great! It takes a huge load off, doesn’t it?   I’m sure if you’re anything like I was, you’ve been slaving too hard for too long to keep the relationship from falling apart.


A goddess understands this reality. She knows that relationships simply just don’t stay afloat when the man is investing less of himself than she is.


And quite frankly, she’s not interested in slaving to get a man to love her at all. She’s not even interested in working as hard as he does.A goddess knows she’s the queen bee and he’s the WORKER bee.


But how do you get a man to love you if a relationship only works well when he’s the one doing the work to make you happy?How do you get him working hard again?


Here’s where my guidance comes in…


“Introducing Kristina Marchant’s Prism Effect”


Prism Effect Prism


Remember back to elementary school when you learned about prisms and how they work? Well, let me remind you…


Prisms are optical elements with flat, smooth surfaces that refract light. A dispersive prism can break up light into the colors of a rainbow.


I want you to use the image of the prism— absorbing light and turning it into a rainbow– as a new way of looking at love.


My Prism Effect will show you how to inspire a man to WANT to work hard to keep you happy.


How My Prism Effect Works:


In my new ebook, The Prism Effect: How To Get A Man To Love You, you’re going to learn how to transform your love life and ignite love in the heart of a distancing man.  I use my new, powerful tool– the analogy of a prism– to help you transform into a modern goddess.  This tool is an easy and highly effective way for me to illustrate my coaching techniques.


And I want to share with you right now the first piece of advice you’ll learn using this new tool…


It’s the most important thing you’ll ever need to know about men. (It goes along with the BIG LIE I revealed above)…


Here it is:


As the woman, you are not offering up the LIGHT in the prism analogy.


You aren’t bringing LIGHT or anything to the relationship.It’s not your job to actively carry the relationship or expend energy and time on doing anything for him. That’s HIS job.He drives the car and you sit in the passenger seat, enjoying the ride.


men who disappearHe’s the one working hard to shower you with everything LIGHT:


  • Attention
  • Affection
  • Words of Inspiration and Encouragement
  • Gifts
  • Acts of Devotion & Service


It’s your job to take all this good stuff (or whatever little amount good stuff he currently offers up to you) and TRANSFORM it into deep and ever-growing LOVE in his heart. It’s your job to authentically make the most of what he brings to the relationship so that he brings more and more LIGHT to you.  You are THE PRISM, HE brings the LIGHT.


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“Turn A Sour Relationship Into A Rainbow!  Inflate Your Value In His Eyes Exponentially!”


As a goddess, you take all his efforts (or the few efforts he’s showing at this point) and brew them into a healthy relationship.This is what I’m going to show you how to do—how to cast a love spell! Without wacky voodoo or strategies.  Without effort and more suffering.


My Prism Effect will guide you on how to easily and effortlessly take the energy a man is investing into a relationship and transform it into a wonderful connection. This connection is the rainbow in the Prism Effect analogy.


So to sum up the Prism Analogy: The Light is the Man’s Efforts, The Prism Is You and The Rainbow Is A Great Relationship!


But how do you act like a prism and create a colorful, gorgeous relationship? Especially when the LIGHT he’s bringing you is minimal at best?  How do you converts a man’s poor efforts into an amazing long-lasting relationship?


“What’s The Answer To Creating A Beautiful Relationship With Him?”




You have to stop burning energy trying to bring the LIGHT to the relationship, so that there’s room for him to step up, be the man and bring the LIGHT!


get a man to love youSecond:


You have to shift your focus off him and onto yourself.




You have to share yourself with a man in a way that hypnotizes him.


A goddess’s priority relationship is with herself.She invests her time and energy in taking care of herself emotionally, spiritually and mentally, and she effectively shares her feelings and needs with a man in a way that makes him fall in love.


Men are natural providers.   They like to work for love.  It makes them feel good about themselves. This is why they like challenges.  I’m not advising you to become a challenging, difficult woman; I’m only telling you to use this innate quality in men help you get a man to love you.


It’s time for you to stop bending yourself into a pretzel for your man’s attention and instead simply listen to your own heart.

“Getting Him Back & Making Him Fall Madly In Love Is Easier Than You Think!”


Try this exercise right now…


What do you feel at this very moment? Happy, sad, frustrated, bewildered and angry? Close your eyes, take a deep breath, calm your mind and ask yourself:


“What am I feeling?”


Say what you feel out loud.  Say it again.  Over and over, until you feel that emotion surfacing more and more.  Allow tension in your body to fall away as your heart’s expression comes forward.   Allow yourself to embody your most authentic self.




Open your eyes. Look out in front of you. Image your man standing feet away from you, looking at you. Smiling at you.


get a man to love youImagine slowly, gently unbuttoning the skin on your chest and revealing your heart and soul to him, as he watches with adoring eyes.


He cherishes seeing you so vulnerable. His attraction fills the space between you both; he’s magnetized by your darker feelings of anger, sadness, hopelessness and fear.  This intrigue causes him to fall in love; knowing such intimate details about who you are makes him feel closer to you.  He’s honored that you trust him enough to expose your beautiful flaws to him; it makes he feel like a good man.


Now, tell him, out loud, how you feel: “I feel ____”


He listens to you, comforts you, tells you everything’s going to be OK. Imagine him coming closer to you, putting his hand on yours, promising to take care of you forever.


How do you feel after doing this exercise? Excited? Sad? Uncomfortable? Awkward and vulnerable?


This fantasy exercise is what a goddess does everyday. This is why she’s a prism. She knows how to capture a man’s attention by sharing her darkest feelings with him.  He becomes entranced and enraptured by her ability to be so intimate.  He’s bewitched– eager to make even the painful feelings he mistakenly causes her go away.


A goddess does the opposite of what most women do.  A goddess uses emotions to create deep intimacy and to fuel his love.


Where most women don’t own their feelings and are afraid of them, goddesses are Emotion Masters.  They don’t bottle up feelings or get over-emotional.  They draw men closer with their vulnerability instead of tuning men out with drama, which is what most women do.


After all, emotions are the foundation for love. Romantic feelings aren’t sparked by pleasing him. You can’t make a man love you with your cooking, your sex or your money. Romantic feelings are triggered by his emotions. And a goddess triggers a man’s emotions using her own.


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“You Already Have Everything It Takes To Unleash Your Inner Goddess! You Can Step Into Her Power FAST”


My Prism Effect will not only show you the words, body language and appropriate thoughts to WARM YOU UP to a man– making you feel sexy, sensual and soft so that you can share your emotions with him (even the dark, scary emotions), my Prism Effect will also show you how to effectively ASK for what you want!


Remember—the more you get a man to do for you, the more you get a man to love you: A man’s love is equal to the time and energy he invests in you. It’s therefore only natural that the key to getting him to love you is knowing how to effectively ask for what you want.


My ebook The Prism Effect: How To Get A Man To Love You is packed with tons of advice on how to be a true goddess—a woman who does less and gets more! It will show you how to expose your deepest, most authentic self to man and make him putty in your hands.


In the book, you’ll also learn:


  • All about my new term called MESSAGING. It’s the way that a man tells you all you need to know about his feelings without saying a word directly.


  • The only 2 questions you’ll have to ask yourself to know whether or not your man is capable of bringing any quality LIGHT to the prism.


  • get his loveHow to be 100% transparent with a man in a way that enchants him completely.


  • The right words to express your needs and wants effectively with men.


  • Ways to boost your feminine allure, so that you SPARKLE in his eyes.


  • How to make yourself more emotionally available to his attention and affection (You may be pushing him away and not even know it)


  • The best techniques to STOP YOU from reaching out to a drifting man. (We all know not to call a man when he’s distancing himself, but most of us don’t know how to stop reaching out. My images, visuals and exercises will help you stay feeling empowered no matter what he’s doing!)



If you want to embrace the POWER of a Prism Goddess—a woman who knows how to take the efforts of a man and convert them into love in his heart…


If you want to stop feeling insecure, needy, miserable and powerless to your drifting man’s poor behavior…


If you want to walk in the way of a goddess and KNOW without a doubt that you are a stunning, desirable, smart and wonderful woman worthy of the love of a great man…





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“You Can Learn How To Get A Man To Love You—Try Prism Effect Right Now, Risk-Free!”


You can get my ebook for $27 (less than the cost of a good bottle of wine) AND you can get it without worrying about not liking it. You can return it for a full refund at any time!


If you don’t feel like a new woman—if you don’t feel equipped with new tools and insight to turn a drifting man around, then just contact me and I’ll return your money!


get his love, relationship issues


I want you to feel like the prism with your man; I want you to have to ability to put a love spell on him and make your relationship into something as magical as a rainbow.


There are things that are productive, positive and empowering that you can focus your energy on right now, without actually doing anything for your man!   My Prism Effect will take you through it all.Because this is what he needs from you—you to stop slaving for him and start intoxicating him!


I know that everything I’ll teach you in Kristina Marchant’s Prism Effect- How To Get A Man To Love You will make you sit up and have an Aha! moment with your man! I’ve put my heart and soul into the ebook– coaching you, motivating you and educating you on men. You deserve it all!


All My Love & Inspiration,


Kristina Marchant

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Instant Download Ebook, PDF format


dating help for women

Dating Advice For Women: Knowing When To Be Optimistic About Love

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Pop psychology loves to pump people full of romanticized faith:  poetic photographs with quotes preaching positivity on friends’ Facebook pages; the word ‘hope’ carved into pocket-size stones and spelled out in rhinestones on hundred-dollar bracelets.  And why not?  Why not encourage a little optimism, especially in love?  With a dismal divorce rate and couples having less and less faith in long-term commitment, why not push people to trust a bit more?


My coaching is all about having an open heart with men.   I encourage women to have a little-girl heart when dating or in a relationship:  find your childlike whimsy, feel your emotions fully and live in the present moment.  But what I don’t want women to do, and what often happens is, women hold onto false hope.


Don’t Stay Optimistic About Love As An Excuse To Continue A Bad Relationship


Has Mr. Unavailable been hanging around, staying just out of reach but close enough to make your mouth water?


You can’t stop thinking about him, strategizing on how you can get him to come just a little closer and realize his true feelings for you.  You not only remain optimistic about love, you remain a champion fighter for the cause.  You STUFF DOWN all the yucky, negative feelings.  Especially the anger– oh boy, you sure don’t want him to see that slimy black gook.  You even fight back the tears and the heaviness and you make a promise to yourself that you will be more fun, more exciting and sexier next time you are around him.  You wrap yourself into a pretzel trying to cater to all his apparent needs and be that source of unconditional love in his life he’s never known.

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But the reality is that your negative feelings don’t just disappear when you ignore them long enough; they go somewhere.  They are very patient li’l buggers, hanging out in the depths of your soul, waiting for a vulnerable moment to break free and blow up to the surface.   You end up blowing up at Mr. Unavailable, experiencing emotional roller coaster rides every time he disappoints you, and you end up acting passive aggressive or needy.


Sometimes Believing In The Brighter Side Of A Bad Boy Leaves You In Total Darkness


We all know when we are dating (or even married to) Mr. Unavailable: we know he’s got a glitch in the empathy processing systems in his brain; we know he’s a man boy who can’t seem to hold himself accountable to anything; we know intimacy terrifies the crap out of  him and that he cheats or disappears for days.  Yet we hold onto faith.  We get on the computer and pluck “believe in love” memes from Google Images; we buy books, eBooks and ePrograms to help us seduce him into our arms.  The problem is that he will never come.  He can’t. He doesn’t have the tools in his toolbox.


Be Optimistic About Finding Real Love


Sometimes the best faith we can have is in a power higher than ourselves, and I’m not talking about God.  I’m talking about the power of  true love.  I’m talking about having the faith to continue dating a guy you know is a good man and would make a stable and committed partner even when you don’t initially feel the attraction, the chemistry, the spark.  If you have FAITH in the power of love, you can stay in that dating relationship and trust that mutual attraction will happen over time.  Because it will.  (It’s about having faith in your intuition, in your ability to create something that goes deeper than chemical romance.  It’s about believing that you are worth more than being kept at a distance by a limited man.)


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Use your intuition and be honest with yourself about men who are lost causes, but don’t become paranoid and ditch a guy at the first sign of a red flag.  Take your time with guys and trust that if you relax on dates, enjoy yourself (while still holding back from sleeping with him too soon or getting too emotionally invested early on), the truth of who a guy is will slowly reveal itself.  A wolf in sheep’s clothing will soon let a whisker or claw pop through if he’s comfortable enough with you.  If this happens, don’t panic.  You’ll live.  Have faith that you can bounce back from him; believe that not all men are wolves and that love is waiting for you.  That’s truly being optimistic about love!


Time To Be Vulnerable Without Being Susceptible


The fastest way to a broken heart is to pretend you don’t have one.  Charlie Sheen said that.  Knowing his reputation, it’s obvious that he has a lot of experience with playing games and what kind of woman is susceptible to his limitations.  If you act hard, brittle, distrusting; if you play games with men because you think that’s the way to find love, you are going to end up burned.  I guarantee you that however fantastic you think your game is, there is a Mr. Unavailable who has a better game.  You have feelings, you have needs, you have a tenderness that yearns for tender protection.  Don’t play with emotionally unavailable men—they will scar your scars.


Instead, play zero games.  And be vulnerable with EVERY man.  Not susceptible, but vulnerable.  This will train you to trust your boundaries and know what feels good and what feels awful.  The way I want you to be vulnerable is to communicate your feelings and allow men, even the Mr. Unavailables, to see your feelings.  I ask that you are open with your heart and emotions in every conversation you have with a man. Have faith in yourself and in your boundaries to always speak the truth about how someone or something makes you feel.  And do it in a way that invites men closer to you…


Open-Hearted Communication:  What To Say & How


The best communication is the easiest and most direct.  To use words to create instant intimacy takes a lot of vulnerability, softness, kindness, and, wait for it…  optimism.  It takes trust that more men will respond lovingly than not, and it takes trust to know that no matter how a man reacts to hearing your feelings, you are going to survive and be okay.  You can’t control a man’s reaction, but you can control how you act and how much dignity you emanate.

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Breathe, find your grounding and state your feelings in a soft, revealing tone that lacks judgment or bitterness.  If you accomplished  this, you’ll be so alluring, you’ll be able to tell a man that you’re “so angry you want to stab him with a kitchen knife” and he’ll still offer you a hug.  (I mean it, it’s happened to me with my man.  And I was holding a knife at the time.)


Examples of open-hearted communication:

“I feel sad and angry when you disappear on me for days.”

“I feel really good when a man kisses me hello, thank you for doing that.”

“I feel uncomfortable on first dates but I’m working through it.”


The best communication requires that you be optimistic about the end result, which isn’t his reaction, but how you are going to feel about yourself for being so open and truthful.


If you want to learn more communication tips, sign up for my Love Advice Newsletter.  In it, I talk extensively about vulnerability vs. susceptibility and how to be a soft, sensual and luscious woman while still remaining strong in your beliefs and boundaries.  If you want to be optimistic about love, you have to share who you are without losing who you are to an emotionally unavailable man

Dating Is Like Dieting! Time To Think Smart About Emotionally Unavailable Men

emotionally unavailable men

My father once told me that the most important decision a woman can make in life is to find a good man and not let an emotionally unavailable man ruin my self-esteem and waste my time. I think my dad’s love help advice is something that both women and men can benefit from learning about love and relationships.


It’s amazing to me how many smart, professionally successful, sexy, soulful, sensual and sweet women get wrapped up in emotionally unavailable men. And guess what? I don’t blame them, because to a big extent, I blame society.


Society promotes unhealthy, unrequited, dysfunctional love like it’s a fantasy about to come true. While there are so many campaigns to get children and teens eating healthier and learning better in school, there are only dysfunctional relationship movies like Twilight that are teaching young people about love, or rather, I should say, codependency.


Goddess Love Help:  Looking For Love Should Be A Self-Loving Experience Like Changing To A Healthy Diet Or Investing Money In Higher Education


Most women who get tangled up in emotionally unavailable men would never let themselves be unhealthy in other ways. These women care deeply about their physical health. They work out; they are disciplined about eating well. They take time for leisurely activities like meditation and trips to the beach with friends.


These women are also proactive about their careers and aren’t afraid to reach for their career dreams. They don’t get caught up in negative thought patterns at work or within their own families; however…


With men, these women are messes in dresses!


I know because I was one!


Are you one too?


What I Learned About The Relationship Between Love & Discipline When It Comes To Emotionally Unavailable Men


If you want a great body, you have to do the work and make the sacrifices. No more cake, and “hello there” apples and green beans! Well, what I learned about love and emotionally unavailable men is that love is like dieting and emotionally unavailable men are potato chips, deep fried brownies and pizza with the works!


Sure emotionally unavailable men are fun to chase. Many of them have perfected what I call “the first act” because they never have relationships that last long enough to get to even the intermission, no less get through the whole play. These men are addictive and their intermittent rewards (they lovingly respond to our advances only some of the time) are so delicious it can feel like you are riding high on heroin while in their arms.


But when it comes down to it, they are destroying your mind, heart and self-esteem just like a drug.


But Women Always Tell Me; “I Love Him! I Have To Have Him!”


I know how it feels to love someone who you know isn’t good for you. I know how hard it is to break away or how easy it is to make excuses for emotionally unavailable men.


However, just like I could say, “But I love the idea of earning money by not doing anything or getting a great, high-paying job without going to school or building my resume slowly”, I could also say, “But I love emotionally unavailable men and I want this one man to love me! Why can’t I just fight for him instead of go out and find a nice man who doesn’t make me as crazy with love?”


If you want to be happy and healthy you have to do the work! It’s that simple.


Ultimately, It’s About What Matters Most To YOU


Is love addiction (that’s what is happening when you love emotionally unavailable men) really an addiction? Is sex addiction? Is gambling or any other addiction that isn’t literally a chemical addiction? I think so. But I also think that even with an addiction that’s out of your control, you have to want to be sober more than be “high”.


emotionally unavailable men, dating tips, dating adviceIf you don’t have a dream relationship in your head, if you don’t see yourself desperately wanting a loving home with a good husband, children and lots of laughter and family moments together, you may spend forever chasing emotionally unavailable men.


Maybe you don’t have a dream relationship but you are just in so much pain from emotionally unavailable men that you know your patterns have to stop. It’s like obese women who don’t have a dream body in mind but know that if they don’t lose weight, they will end up with serious problems up the road. And just like it takes their general practitioner to scare them into changing their diet, I’m here to force women to look at their love lives from a mature and responsible perspective.


So it’s up to you to know what’s important. But just remember that the choices you make today concerning men really do have a lasting impact. Every emotionally unavailable man you chase ends up scaring your heart and self-worth in a way that’s hard to fix up the road.


So How Do I Know Which Are The Emotionally Unavailable Men?


Do you really need a checklist? Deep down, women always know.


If he doesn’t feel for you what you feel for him and if he isn’t showing signs of wanting and striving for a commitment with you, he’s one of the many emotionally unavailable men out there.


Even if he was coming on strong in the beginning and especially if he was coming on too strong in the beginning, he can still be emotionally unavailable. The hardest thing about breaking free from a man like this is that you get addicted to the beginning of the relationship and trying to get it back. But it’s not coming back because the whole thing with emotionally unavailable men is that the closer you get emotionally, the more they have to break away.


Yes, they come back. Yes, they come back fully invested and ready for a commitment. But nothing about the level of commitment in their heart deepens. And… it’s only a matter of time before they get emotionally distant aand pull back again.


Check out my eBook, Red Rose Woman: The Enchantress Inside You and learn all about my enchantress secrets that, when followed like”goddess love help” rules, will build your self-confidence and put you on a healthy man diet!  Dating advice for women is all about spotting “binge dating” before it destroys you!

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Dating Advice For Women: How To Win A Man’s Heart

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How high is your “cherish quotient”?  Win a man’s heart & fill him with lust…


If you want to win a man’s heart you have to understand what I call your “cherish quotient”– how cherishable you are!  A man can care about you, like you, desire you or even love you, but to make him fall in love with you, you have to make him cherish you like an angel.  He also has to cherish you like a hot sexy mama that he doesn’t ever want to stop sleeping with.


To make a man feel both safe coming closer to you emotionally while also inspiring him want to ravish you senseless is the KILLAH COMBO that will win a man’s heart.  When you accomplish both of these things, you have a high cherish quotient!


Love Help On Making Him Feel Safe Coming Closer Emotionally


A HUGE mistake a lot of women make is thinking that care taking will make a man feel emotionally safe coming closer.  This couldn’t be further from the truth.  You aren’t going to win a man’s heart with caregiving!


If you think that a man is going to have a heart-to-heart emotional connection with you because you do things for him like cook for him, clean for him, buy him things, excuse his poor behavior because he is an addict or just plain immature– you are mistaken.


Love Help: Being the “Good Woman” Doesn’t Necessarily Add To Your Cherish Quotient


A man may appreciate these acts of service and kindness.  He may call you a “good woman” and brag about how good you are to him to his friends and family.  He may talk about how he SHOULD marry you because you’re good—heck he may have married you because you’re a good woman.  But being a good woman isn’t going to win a man’s heart—it may make him fall further in love, but it’s not going to do anything if he isn’t already madly in love.


Being a good woman is possibly going to maybe make him think twice before leaving you or cheating on you, depending on his conscience.  However, it may also make him think he can treat you like a doormat—depending on whether he’s compassionate and if you treat him better than you treat yourself.


It’s All About The Feelings You Can Prick & Provoke With Your Emotional Life


A heart-to-heart connection starts and ends with you’re ability to use your emotions to provoke feelings in him for you and for life, in general.  You’ll often hear me talking about making a man feel alive inside.  If you want to win a man’s heart, you have to make him feel like his moments with you are the moments in which he feels the most connected to his own existence.


Romantic love really isn’t about feeling something for another person as much as it’s a coveting and loving of the way another person makes you feel inside.  It can be about selfless acts and unconditional commitment if you both are mature and capable partners, but the foundation is selfish and based on stirred-up feelings.


Why Drama Queens Grab Men’s Attention


how to win a man's heart, connect with his heart, dating advice, dating tips, dating adviceI used to be a drama queen and boy, was I a headache.  I didn’t mean to be dramatic—no drama queen wants to be; however, I was such a whirlwind of spewed, uncontained emotion, it was probably exhausting to be around me.  However, I used to attract a lot of men—not for long, of course, because they would get tired of my antics.  I never won their hearts, but I certainly captured their interest and intrigue, and a lot of that was because I was dramatic.


Now—I’m NOT telling you to be a drama queen to win a man’s heart.  And if you are, keep reading my dating advice for women because these ways of relating that I’m going to talk about are far more effective than dramatics.   However, I first want to say that I mention drama queens because I want to explain why they attract men.


Drama queens make men feel alive inside.  Because they are so impulsive, sensitive and uncontained, it’s as if they are turning up the volume on his emotional states so high that he is able to feel himself through her drama.  Drama is infectious; the more you are around it, the more it stirs things up inside you and the next thing you know, you are taking a roller coaster ride with the dramatic person—experiencing their highs and lows.


Highs and lows are addictive.  I’m sure you’ve met a bad boy or two that set you off on an emotional roller coaster.  Getting away from toxic relationship problems is hard—we plug into the pain.


Make Him Feel Alive In A Safe Way To Win A Man’s Heart


You don’t have to take a man on a roller coaster ride to love you.  In fact, only the men who are damaged and terrified of commitment and love will stick around for the roller coaster.  You can win a man’s heart by helping him explore his depth through your vulnerability.


When you can be vulnerable with a man and show him a secret peek deep inside your heart, you open doors in his.  We learn about ourselves through our relationships and the more you can show a man that you are in touch with your feelings, can easily share your feelings and can deal with your feelings maturely and in a healthy way, the more you can show him how to process his own.


Men Have A Hard Time Processing Feelings


Men have been told since they were small to “man up”.  They don’t know how to tackle all their feelings.  Most of them lead with anger or self-loathing feelings because they don’t know how to process sad, or even tender, happy feelings.   When you can help him feel his own inner life, he won’t be able to forget you or be away from you.  You will be like a roadmap for him to get to his own heart.  That is when a connection happens– that’s when you win a man’s heart and stamp it with your name!


A simple talk about your feelings and your fears can lead to a major conversation about his own repressed feelings and emotional needs.  When you share your inner goddess world with him, a door inside him opens that can’t be closed again—it may terrify him, anger him, make him try to push you away…  But ultimately, it will magnetize him to you.


It will also make him want to ravish you senseless.


There Is Something About Our Vulnerability That Drives Men Crazy With Desire


how to win a man's heart, sensualityA recent study revealed that men are aroused by women who appear vulnerable.  Now, I don’t want you to be or appear weak or susceptible—that’s different.  When a woman is weak or susceptible, it makes her needy.


Most men think that vulnerable women are trouble. This study also revealed that these same men, who were attracted to photos of women in vulnerable poses, also said that they would never date these women.  The reason probably has to do with how draining a vulnerable woman can be when she doesn’t have a strong, malleable center that grounds her to the earth.


When you are an enchantress/goddess/siren you are vulnerable but you are NOT susceptible.  You are able to share you softer, tender loving feelings, but you aren’t a train wreck.  You aren’t a doormat or a needy wet blanket.  An enchantress is supple and soft hearted AND she knows when she is simply not going to tolerate bad treatment.  She also knows how to take care of her emotions and self-soothe and not claw at a man to make him take care of her uncontainable feelings.




To accomplish the other half of having a high cherish quotient, you have to make him want to ravish you senseless.  Though physical chemistry is thought to only be an inexplicable and natural thing, it can actually be cultivated.


To increase a man’s attraction for you and to win his heart , you should walk around on this earth like a goddess from another world who owns her sensuality.  When you can feel fluid, luscious, doughy, fluffy, and warm in your body– with heightened senses and a quiet mind that allows you to live in the moment– you can seduce a man.


A sensual woman who brings a man into the moment makes a man feel his own aliveness.  This makes him feel his own body and takes him out of his mind.  When this happens he is in the relaxed state for attraction to build.  His body feel alive, he is lost in you and the moment and arousal builds.


You don’t have to be beautiful with a dynamo body.  You just have to own the body and looks you do have.  You have to walk in your curves and not have abusive thoughts about your self-image.  You have to take care of your looks by indulging yourself with luxurious and yummy-smelling perfume oils, body lotions and body washes.


You don’t have to wear a lot of makeup or get tarted-up.  You just have to do what you can to feel good about yourself.  Forget about obsessing over what he will think; wear what makes you feel sexy inside.  When you feel good about what you are wearing—he feels good around you because you have more confidence and freedom to let loose in the moment.


If you want to know more about how to win a man’s heart– how to make a man come closer emotionally and attracting men with your sensuality, sign up for my Love Advice Newsletter.  It’s jammed packed full of very helpful, effective tips, insight and tools to bring that special man close!

Need A Status Makeover? Interview With Rachel Russo Of

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Looking for a status makeover?  


If you’re single or in a relationship and want to tie the knot, my friend and fellow dating coach Rachel Russo can help you find Mr. Right and inspire him to take the plunge!


Rachel, a NYC-based Dating, Relationship, & Image Coach for marriage-minded singles and couples, is sassy, smart and very knowledgable.  With a master’s degree in Marriage & Family Therapy, Rachel offers her Status Makeover coaching sessions to help women buff and polish their goddess energy.  She’ll give you confidence, happiness and a li’l sexy in your step to go out into the world and rope in the most fabulous man, effortlessly!


Rachel took some time out from her busy schedule to answer a few questions for my readers.  Read on to discover some amazing online dating tips, advice how on to approach the “talk” about commitment, and more…


You refer to your single and couples coaching sessions as status makeover courses? I love the idea of a status makeover—going for “It’s complicated” or “Is single” to “in a relationship”! Without giving too much away, what would you tell women to expect from a coaching session with you?


The philosophy of Status Makeover is that we should love our love lives—no matter what our status. In an initial coaching session, I’d take an assessment of a woman’s love life. I’d learn the details of her relationship history and her beliefs about dating, relationships, love, and marriage. I’d listen closely to her story to pinpoint patterns and trends. Together, we’d determine her strengths, weakness, opportunities, and threats for achieving her goals for the future. Whether a female client wants to end, find, or keep love, my job in an initial session is to provide her with a solid, fun, efficient, and effective plan for how to do it.


You say that your coaching programs for singles are designed for those people who have it all and just want a great love life. Why do you think there are so many fabulous people who are single? Is it just that they haven’t had time for love, had bad luck in the past or is there some other personality factor that keeps a smart, sexy, got-it-all gal from finding the relationship she deserves?


There are a lot of fabulous people who are single because they have spent most of their life focused on making themselves fabulous. Women today are socialized to develop their career first and then find a man. Many focus too much on work, and before they know it they are never married forty-year olds competing with twenty-five years olds for the few good relationship-oriented men that are still standing. Other women simply spent too many of their best years in love with the wrong guys.


On your site,, you claim that you can show a woman how to look at a man’s online dating profile and see if he’s worth her time. It’s really interesting. What’s one thing you would advise women to look for when scrolling through profiles?


Of course you can’t always judge a book by its cover, but when it comes to online dating profiles; it is in a woman’s best interest to avoid men with red flags. If a woman is looking for a man who is serious about getting married, a short and crappy profile is a red flag. Marriage-minded men get professional headshots and create well-written, detailed profiles. They take the time to make a good first impression because they are genuinely looking for love.


You also offer relationship counseling. What can a woman do to help spice up her sex life with her man? What can she do to build emotional intimacy? Do you think sex and emotional intimacy go hand-in-hand in a long-term relationship?


There are plenty of things a woman can do to keep things hot in the bedroom from roleplaying, sex toys, sensual massages, and sexy outfits, to just reading each other sex scenes in romance novels. Emotional intimacy can be built through open and honest conversations—sans the judgments. A woman needs to share her feelings and show vulnerability with her man so he feels safe doing the same. I think sex is better when there is emotional intimacy, but some couples can still have satisfying sex lives without the intimacy.


Having the “talk” about commitment is really scary for women because it can easily push a man away. What do you advise a woman should say or not say to help get her man to open up and talk honestly and lovingly about where he is at in the relationship?


Call me old school, but I believe a man should lead in terms of relationship progression. I don’t advise women to initiate conversation about where the relationship stands. I believe that if a man wants a serious commitment, a woman will know it. All she can do is be open and honest about how she feels and hope he will be on the same page. With men, actions speak louder than words. If a woman doesn’t see that a guy wants to be serious, she should assume he isn’t ready or willing to commit and keep her options open.


Confidence is so important when dating. It makes a woman or man attractive and easy to be with. However, if a woman doesn’t have much confidence, what do you advise that she can do to feel better about herself and appear more radiantly confident?


If a woman is lacking confidence, I suggest that she give herself and her living space a makeover. When we look beautiful and are surrounded by beauty, we feel beautiful. Sometimes just cleaning out your closet and creating new outfits out of what you already have can make you feel incredibly powerful. Once a woman starts feeling empowered-and not a victim of her circumstances-she naturally radiates confidence.


How can a woman who wants to have a status makeover get in touch with you?


If she’s just flirting with the idea, she can tweet me @RachelTRusso

If she’s pretty much ready to get started, she can email me at

If she wants to start making over her love life today, she can call me at 973 223 6406.


rachel russo, status makeover, dating coachRachel Russo, MS, MFT